Awkward Family Photo

Chestnuts roasting on an open fire...

Deal With It

If Tank had an Online Dating Profile

About me:
I'm a laid back guy looking for a little companionship. Just got out of a two year relationship with a real bitch. Sometimes I like to just get in the car and go for a drive. It really helps to clear my head. I eat well and like to stay in shape, either by going on brisk walks or running a few laps in my backyard. I've been told I'm pretty cute and that my ears are my best feature.

About my match:
I am most attracted to BBDs (big, beautiful dogs). I'm looking for someone who enjoys snuggling, likes to give and receive affection, has the ability to spend all day in bed or on the couch, and has a natural curiousity for all things life has to offer.

If this sounds like you, bark back atcha boy.

Of course Tank would chose the obligatory shirtless picture of himself for his profile picture. He also wanted me to tell the ladies that he will send nudes upon request.

More paw language

It's the language of love. :)

Communication via paw (Paw language)

To be fair, he did try tapping ever so lightly first, before going in for the kill...

If Metallica has taught us anything...

it's to sleep with one eye open...

gripping your pillow tight!!!!

Starbucks

Yesterday morning, I woke up with a hangover. I had stayed out until 3 the night before and because I can't seem to sleep in past 7 anymore, I was awake after only a few hours of sleep. I decided I'd go and grab a coffee from Starbucks, because adding caffeine to my hangover seemed like a good idea. Yay. I've got all this energy now to focus on how crappy I feel.

I took the dogs with me on my short drive. When I pulled up to the drive-thru window I was pleasantly surprised when they asked me if my dogs wanted treats! Apparently, the woman at the counter didn't get a good look at Lucy, otherwise, she probably wouldn't have asked that question, but I said sure and the dogs ate them as if they had gone weeks without food.

I did an impromptu photo shoot while waiting in the really long drive-thru line.

It's 120 degrees out at 8 in the morning. Hooray!

After seeing my hot yoga pamphlet in my car door: Hot yoga? Yawn.

After being given that treat: Please sir, may I have some more?

And here's Tank, really owning that arm rest.

It's All About Comfort

He never ceases to amuse me.

If the Shoe Fits

Bangers and Mash

I'm wondering... am I the only person that talks to their dogs with an english accent?

It started off normal enough (ello, loves) and now it's kind of progressed into a full blown Sharon Osbourne kind of accent.

To be honest, I think the dogs kind of like it (and I like it). The only downside is that sometimes when I have company over, I forget that I talk to the dogs in an english accent and that can lead to some awkward moments...



And yes, my impression of Sharon Osbourne is just as good as Amy Pohler's in this clip. ;)

Excuse me...may I have a moment of your time?

This is the first thing that I noticed as I stepped out of the shower the other morning.




















This shot was taken immediately after I opened the door:



















You simply mustn't ever shower with the door closed...

While We're Still on the Subject of Cool iPhone Apps

Here's a picture that my mom took with my iPhone yesterday with the Hipstamatic app. I like the old school feel it gives to the picture.

Mug

Trying to capture extreme snaggletooth but realized that the photo does it no justice.

Too Cool for School

It's been awhile...

I will have many new posts very soon, but here are a couple pictures to tide you over until then.

Beware of falling objects

I don't eat at the dinner table like a normal person. No, I like to stand and eat in my kitchen. My brother does this too. We're strange folk.

Anyway, tonight as I was standing and eating a burrito that was basically 90% sour cream - 10% beans, it exploded as I took my last bites! Someone needs a bath.

I'm trying out this new scent, L'eau de sour cream, ever heard of it?

Some people like to eat food, I prefer to wear it.

Day 4 of 14

I took 2 weeks off for the holidays. Besides working out, this is pretty much what my days have consisted of.

Top of the morning to ya

Warning: This post is about vomit, so if the talk of vomit makes you want to vomit, you might want to skip this one.

Well, it's yet another morning where I've been woken up to the harmonious sound of dog hurl. Tank's hours of puking are between sound asleep and sweet dreams. Never has he so much as gagged during normal business hours. I've woken up to being puked on (I'll take a warm pile of vomit for $100, Alex), puking off the side of the bed (Avalanche!), to just regular old heaving on the floor. Personally, I like it when Tank gets creative with where he is going to projectile. For some reason when Tank started up this morning I started singing that song from Beverly Hills Cop, "The Heat is On" but I just replaced "heat" with "puke."

The puke is on...it's on the streets.

Inside your head, on every beat.

Oh-wo-ho, oh-wo-ho.

Fun with photobooth!

Why am I single??











































Oh, right.